It's been so long, I cannot even remember how to start an lj entry. Lots of things happened, a lot of them didn't. But let us just talk about the happy things that DID happen. Funnily enough, happy isn't something I'd applied to the situations at hand right now. A few months ago, I would have been delighted by the prospect, but experiencing reality as a as-is state and not "what might be" tends to have that disillusioning effect.
I got my editorial internship at a local radio here in Berlin. With the end of this week, I'll have worked 3 weeks of the morning shift in one row starting at 4:30am each day, ending at 12:30 pm. I'll be so so glad to get the afternoon shift after that again, I am extremely exhausted. Always tired, always sleepy, never getting anything done. It frustrates me to an incredible extent, where I start to display a violent temper at the slightest occasion. It's ridiculous, really. Should I get counseling?
The internship is anything you can think of: Boring, frustrating, stressful, informative, educating, too early, too late, confusing, infuriating, long winded... I went through fundamental feelings towards my internship over the weeks, differing so profoundly each day it astounds even me. The beginning started off rather promising, but the excitement quickly waned, giving birth to bouts of frustration and readjustment of expectations. Working 8hrs a day without payment can get to you really quickly. Let me tell you this: One months done, two more to go. Thank goodness. I could need some serious sleep here. (The fault lies with me, however. I never manage to go to bed early enough.)
The work at the Jewish Museum is the complete opposite so far. Strangely enough. It's so relaxing and entertaining and fun, even if at parts it can get lonely and boring. Boring is good, I say. It's the kind of boring I can need right now (should it ever get too
dull, I have a lot of Jewish history to catch up on). Besides, we get employee discount at the Liebermann's restaurant. Hummus with pita and olives, omnomnom. Cheap, delicious food is always a plus in my book. (There's a Channuka market at the Jewish Museum, too OoOOH) Earning your share of the rent is a great, wonderful feeling, and the last two months healed me from being a lazy bum, turning me into a wonderful busy butterfly. I don't want to sit around any longer, I refuse to remain useless, I refuse to be a parasite any longer. There is no time like now, and I am done wasting my life like this. I have not reached all my goals yet, which is good. Great, even. Without goals, there is no reason to carry on, now is there? Well, except to nourish one's hedonistic tendencies. Which I fully intend to do, when (if!) I find the time, ohoho.
And who knows, next year I might actually have saved enough money to travel to Israel and see the one true wonder of the medieval world, the place so many yearned to see, but never reached. Ah, I cannot wait. It's going to be amazing, exceptional, and touching to see Jerusalem for myself *_* Eeeh.
This aside, here's the good news: We moved. Oh yeaaah. We still need to furniture the flat, but most things are set, more or less. Looks still pretty chaotic, haha. As it wont to be. Unfortunately, my broken heater disrupts the joy of having my own place. I wished my landlady would fix it asap ;-; It's starting to get nasty outside and I'd hate to freeze to death.
So here are the things I want to get done the next year/in the near future:
• Sign up for the medieval studies master's program.
• Buy a car.
• Go on a loooong vacation in Israel ♥
Baby steps, haha. I don't want to fall on my face too quickly. C: It's sort of true, then, isn't it? The more you mature, the more things you suddenly have to organize, manage super important issues like HEALTH INSURANCE WHAT, get the laundry done, earn the rent. Kind of scary, and I am keeping a To-Do list or else I'd forget at least half of it. The worst part, tho, is, that nobody got a bullet proof plan how to get shit done successfully (but then, isn't that part of the adventure?). I guess Peter Pan won't come to my window from now on :C