As Roy said: "I feel delicate." I don't even know why, I could tear up at the next best occasion or curl into a ball and wrap myself in warm blankets. I actually want to do that most days, now that I think about it. Hmmm. Winter depression? I hardly think so. It's not your usual "All is dark and shitty, I want to die"-despair, more like a subliminal urge to hug and feel cozy and cared for?
Aside from that, I just noticed again how much I really really love
the early medieval period and how badly I must go to Oslo for this really awesome master's program
. Arghlaldhdbssfff. But where to take the money frommmmmmaaaaach ლ(ಠ益ಠლ)
Seriously though, why is it, that there is no one I can fangirl with over Vikings, Anglo-Saxons, Thor, Loki and all that kind of shit in a really super nerdy way? Where are all the history buffs hiding?? :T My fellow students aren't much of an option to turn to. It's like talking against a wall with them ;_;
What's worse though, is how bad I got with drawing. I really got rusty, but that's not the bad part. There is simply no need or desire to do it; of course, I doodle when talking on the phone or during our Werewolf-sessions, it helps me concentrate, but actually drawing? Not so much. I have ideas and images in my head, but lack everything else. The hell is happening?
So in conclusion: Fuck you life, why do you always keep the really good things just out of my reach? >:C
While I looked up a translation for Regin Smiður, I stumbled over this word and since I love etymology, I had to look it up c: So have at thee:wroth [rəʊθ rɒθ]
adj; Old English wrāth; related to Old Saxon wrēth, Old Norse reithr, Old High German reid curly haired
I am reading the Völsunga saga currently and I've had this mental image of Regin as a dark haired, grimy smith with wild eyes, barrel chested and tree trunk like arms. Turns out he's actually a dwarf. Dödöt. As Völuspá and Reginsmál relate him to the dvergar, I suppose its a given fact and I can scratch my beautifully constructed design and start anew. Baaaah.
Then again, I had been wondering, how Regin could have such a strange family without displaying any of the genetic peculiarities himself. I even wondered, with whom his father had lain to beget an otter and a dragon as sons respectively. But Hreiðmarr is the King of the Dwarves himself, sooooo there you go. These dwarves, I tell you. Crazy shape shifters, the lot of them...
Talking about dwarves: Andvari who loses his gold and the ring Andvarinaut (which he both curses) to Loki, is also a shape shifter, living beneath the waterfall Andvarafors as a luce. For some reason, he reminds me of Gollum.... Oh yeah, he's apparently the equivalent to Alberich, another King* of the Dwarves (or Elves?), as well, who can turn invisible and guards the Nibelungen hoard. BUT! And that's the interesting part: apparently, some scholars see him as the original Oberon, which is the French translation of his name. The more you know *rainbow*.
I still cannot believe Regin is a midget. :(
Anyways, here an illustration from the Ramsund rune carving to cheer me up and to mark a worthy ending to a silly post (I cannot even begin to explain how funny I find Sigurd down there, stabbing Fafnir and all. And that face of the dragon OHGOD WHAT IS AIR):
*I swear, they call anyone rich and important enough to be mentioned in these sagas a king...
I know you're probably upset with me for suggesting that it might not be wise to complain about others not crediting your work when you constantly delete things. I apologize for that. I didn't realize there were other contributing factors.
But now my curiosity is piqued. You are very talented, and even if I'm not interested in the particular fandom, I can still appreciate the work that you put into each drawing. I admit that I think it's a bit sad that you don't draw original work and only focus on fanart, but that's me being selfish to see what you'd come up with on your own.
So where does the passion come from? Is drawing, for you, merely a compulsion? Are fandom and drawing tied together? What would you draw if you didn't draw fanart?
Thank you for answering. -sweet2nothing
if i didn’t draw fanart, i wouldn’t draw anything. i would probably write. or teach earth science.
i like seeing what makes a character look like he does, is all. i like the feeling of putting marks on paper. it’s not really passion. it’s arbitrary.
but i think it’s sad that you wish i drew original work. that’s like saying to someone, “i don’t believe this is really you.”
people who draw original art get praised for their vision and creativity. you don’t have to be familiar with any of their characters, and you don’t have to be in any fandom to know what’s going on. no prior knowledge is required because you love what they do as artists.
but people who draw fanart only get a sidestep reaction. it’s either “i don’t know who this is, but you drew it very well” or “congratulations; you’ve made it look like him. now will you please grow up and stop being silly and draw us something we can actually like?”
you wouldn’t think to say these things to regular artists because regular art is about the artist herself. but fanart? well, that’s okay, because fanart is just a trick. it’s just wasted time.
i think you should stop sending me messages.
I can actually heartily agree with Euclase here. Never saw it like this, but it's true. Not everyone craves to be an 'artist' who makes a living with original art. Maybe out of fear, or lack of support. For some it's a calling, a passion, and they pursue their dreams til the very end no matter what - and that's great! But for me it's a wonderful hobby, simple as that. This does not necessarily mean my art is worthless because I have a different mindset, a different approach... or does it?
What do you guys think? Do you view fanart as a waste of time and talent?
Der Unterschied zw. Skandinavistik und Anglistik - Ich habe in einer höflichen Email um einen Termin bei den jeweiligen Studienfachberatungen gebeten und bekam nun diese Antworten.Skandi:
herzlichen Glückwunsch zu deiner Immatrikulation und willkommen am Nordeuropa-Institut! (Ich hoffe, das skandinavische „du“ ist für dich ok.)
Du kannst gern diese Woche vorbeikommen – ich bin jeden Tag ab spätestens 9 Uhr erreichbar. Nächste Woche bin ich nur Montag im Institut…
Bis dann, TomasAnglistik:
Mi, 23.3.11, zwischen 10.15 u.11.30h, UL6, R.3018.
- :for the lulz, know thy enemy, orly?, random, rule britannia, scandinavia, some nice flowers, srsly you guys, the droids you've been looking for, the sound of brilliance, this is the life
It's almost a week since my internship ended. I meant to write a mean spirited, judging post full of vitriol about the work and my so called colleagues at the end of January. To get even, in a way. But now that it's over and done, there's nothing left but relief and a tiny sense of sadness. :/ Strange, huh? I don't really feel like writing about the internship anymore, because the tight, hot knot in my stomach vanished the day it was over. And left a blank space instead. I guess it's what happens to most people who work 7 days a week and finally, unexpectedly, are confronted with so called free time. It takes the wind out of your sails.
I gotta admit, I feel a bit lost. I know I got to find some new means of income, and I'm working on it (the chance came flying in just one day after my internship). It's just still so strange not to have to get up at 3:20am, or watch the news, talk to people on the phone. I still got the professional autopilot going when I phone someone. That's nice, I guess, because it lends you confidence, a mask to hide behind. But I am not sure if I always want to introduce myself with my "internship-voice".
Despite the new freedom I still don't go out, still don't meet the friends I promised myself to meet. Because I never really find the opportunity (I know it's been only a few days, 3 to be exact, that I didn't have to work - where I chose to finally go to Ikea and buy the missing furniture for my room instead of... everything else). I hope it will change the next few weeks. :/ I really miss being socially available.
Aaah, but it's still nice not to have to leave the house for 4 days out of 7. All I need to do now is to change my working hours at the JMB from Fr/Sa/Su to something more humane. Oh, and hope for being accepted at the University, of course.
All in all, I feel much more relaxed while still being stressed out. FOR WHAT EVER REASON. There's still so much to do, I don't know where to start, aaaaaah.
I srsly need a paid account again. I miss my icons :C
It's been so long, I cannot even remember how to start an lj entry. Lots of things happened, a lot of them didn't. But let us just talk about the happy things that DID happen. Funnily enough, happy isn't something I'd applied to the situations at hand right now. A few months ago, I would have been delighted by the prospect, but experiencing reality as a as-is state and not "what might be" tends to have that disillusioning effect.
I got my editorial internship at a local radio here in Berlin. With the end of this week, I'll have worked 3 weeks of the morning shift in one row starting at 4:30am each day, ending at 12:30 pm. I'll be so so glad to get the afternoon shift after that again, I am extremely exhausted. Always tired, always sleepy, never getting anything done. It frustrates me to an incredible extent, where I start to display a violent temper at the slightest occasion. It's ridiculous, really. Should I get counseling?
The internship is anything you can think of: Boring, frustrating, stressful, informative, educating, too early, too late, confusing, infuriating, long winded... I went through fundamental feelings towards my internship over the weeks, differing so profoundly each day it astounds even me. The beginning started off rather promising, but the excitement quickly waned, giving birth to bouts of frustration and readjustment of expectations. Working 8hrs a day without payment can get to you really quickly. Let me tell you this: One months done, two more to go. Thank goodness. I could need some serious sleep here. (The fault lies with me, however. I never manage to go to bed early enough.)
The work at the Jewish Museum is the complete opposite so far. Strangely enough. It's so relaxing and entertaining and fun, even if at parts it can get lonely and boring. Boring is good, I say. It's the kind of boring I can need right now (should it ever get too
dull, I have a lot of Jewish history to catch up on). Besides, we get employee discount at the Liebermann's restaurant. Hummus with pita and olives, omnomnom. Cheap, delicious food is always a plus in my book. (There's a Channuka market at the Jewish Museum, too OoOOH) Earning your share of the rent is a great, wonderful feeling, and the last two months healed me from being a lazy bum, turning me into a wonderful busy butterfly. I don't want to sit around any longer, I refuse to remain useless, I refuse to be a parasite any longer. There is no time like now, and I am done wasting my life like this. I have not reached all my goals yet, which is good. Great, even. Without goals, there is no reason to carry on, now is there? Well, except to nourish one's hedonistic tendencies. Which I fully intend to do, when (if!) I find the time, ohoho.
And who knows, next year I might actually have saved enough money to travel to Israel and see the one true wonder of the medieval world, the place so many yearned to see, but never reached. Ah, I cannot wait. It's going to be amazing, exceptional, and touching to see Jerusalem for myself *_* Eeeh.
This aside, here's the good news: We moved. Oh yeaaah. We still need to furniture the flat, but most things are set, more or less. Looks still pretty chaotic, haha. As it wont to be. Unfortunately, my broken heater disrupts the joy of having my own place. I wished my landlady would fix it asap ;-; It's starting to get nasty outside and I'd hate to freeze to death.
So here are the things I want to get done the next year/in the near future:
• Sign up for the medieval studies master's program.
• Buy a car.
• Go on a loooong vacation in Israel ♥
Baby steps, haha. I don't want to fall on my face too quickly. C: It's sort of true, then, isn't it? The more you mature, the more things you suddenly have to organize, manage super important issues like HEALTH INSURANCE WHAT, get the laundry done, earn the rent. Kind of scary, and I am keeping a To-Do list or else I'd forget at least half of it. The worst part, tho, is, that nobody got a bullet proof plan how to get shit done successfully (but then, isn't that part of the adventure?). I guess Peter Pan won't come to my window from now on :C
New PC arrived today. One of those fancy upgrade ones, ordered it without a hard drive. I got two to spare and this way it's much cheaper. But that bloody thing won't work and now I am left wondering why (understatement of the year). Help desk is no use either, because it's ''Weekend''
. WHERE ARE ROY AND MOSS WHEN YOU NEED THEM?
Listening to Watchmen Soundtrack, it makes me happee ♥ Going to take a bath in a few hours until then I need to finish some work here. I wasted a whole afternoon accomplishing nothing. Strangely enough, this is a recurrent occasion. Should I be worried?
I tried to think of something clever to accompany this .gif but nothing was coming forth. So whatever.